


A Chance to Break our Parents' Patterns

by degausser



Category: Shingeki no Kyojin | Attack on Titan
Genre: M/M, Multi, Street kids AU, cough cough notice the rating change friends, i didn't mean for this to be fluffy but IT IS, jean and eren being cute lil jerks, jean is a mute, jean is an adorable drunk who wants to eat cake, jean slowly realizing he likes eren and not wanting to drive him away uGGGH, this list will probs get longer later ok
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2014-02-14
Updated: 2014-05-19
Packaged: 2018-01-12 07:06:11
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, Underage
Chapters: 11
Words: 20,083
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1183328
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/degausser/pseuds/degausser
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Trost is overrun with teen run aways and orphans, but the system just lets them to fall to the wayside and pretends they don't exist. Jean falls into this niche after admitting his sexuality to his parents, and now he has to deal with all of the emotional set backs. He also was naive enough to think Marco was the only guy for him until this weird fucker named Eren came around.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> A/N: um so I wanted to get back into fanfiction and this idea of au idea of street kid jean/eren with jean as a mute hit me! And I mean there isn’t enough jean/eren fic in the world so I decided to try my hand at this fanfiction writing stuff again. It’s kind of spiraled out of control, and this is just what I have so far, I might add more??? 
> 
> Also wow there are so many great fanmixs on 8tracks for jean/eren, thank you fandom! I can’t even list how many I’ve gone through while writing!

Jean wakes up on his back, underneath three itchy blankets, and on a futon that is a little too small for his tall frame. He coughs harshly, and rubs his too long flannel sleeves over the heaviness of his eyelids before attempting to take in his surroundings. The ceiling is far away with industrial lighting and bare copper pipes, which remind him of the warehouses him and his friends used to sneak into when they wanted to smoke pot. He gently moves his elbows beneath himself, and slowly pushes himself up only to jump as a tanned hand shoves him back into a laying position. The shocking surprise causes him to hack for a few seconds, his lungs trying to catch up, and he turns his teary glare toward the other figure in the room.

He blinks a few times to clear his vision, and chokes at the sudden assault of viridian. He wants to shrink away, and instead averts his gaze at the way this stranger looks at him. He looks soft with concern even with his lips twisted in clear amusement at Jean’s idiocy.

“You’re Jean, right? ” Jean jerks his head up, brows furrowed in confusion because he’s never seen this guy before, and fuck he’s gorgeous. His olive skin glows even underneath the gross lighting, and this causes Jean’s cheeks to heat up while he tries to drag his thoughts away from rambling about the softness of his black hair too. “I’m Eren, I found you in the alley two streets over from the grocery store. You’re a fucking idiot, freezing out there by yourself.”

Jean grinds his jaw in anger, wanting to throw back a barrage of insults, but his throat burns violently at the thought of even spiting out a one-syllable word. So, he just swallows and nods to answer the first question.

Eren’s face turns completive, like he’s pondering if he should tell Jean something heavy, and Jean watches him sigh softly. If there is one thing Jean hates, it’s being treated too delicately, and he huffs to get Eren’s attention. Eren pauses, and then finally says, “I’m Eren, Marco would come by occasionally to trade for supplies, we tried to convince him to stay with us, but he told us; you’re an untrusting asshole.”

The name is like a sucker punch to the gut, and Jean automatically squeezes his eyes shut. His mind begins to play what happened the day before.

\---

_Jean grits his teeth at the pitiful sight of Marco’s pleading eyes, and swallows against the burning sensation of tears forming in his own. He refuses to label this emotion rising in him as sadness, and cradles it to his chest when he renames it as fury._

_“I’m so sorry Jean, but they even sent money to have me come home,” Marco murmurs and Jean thinks that a better person would be happy for him. A better person would tell Marco to go home, fatten up, and wash this awful period of his life from his skin. He’s not a better person though, he’s bitter and fucked up because his parents kicked him out the moment he declared his love for Marco to them, and his parents would never offer to let him crawl home again._

_It’s not like hiding himself away would have made him happier, but at least he would have a safe place to rest his head, and his mother wouldn’t avert her eyes when she saw him idling outside of the local supermarket._

_“Fuck you,” he spits out and flinches at the broken expression on Marco’s face. He hasn’t spoken in months, since his parents hissed at him and cast him out like a filthy stray into the streets. He was used to being their golden boy, even when he gauged his ears and opted for an under cut. The shock was too much for him, and his throat has been hurting for months after that. He knows it’s all in his head, that his throat is perfectly fine, but Marco doesn’t push him and suddenly Jean regrets that his first words in months are so hateful._

_A better person would have forced a smile of understanding and sent the person they loved on their way, but maybe Jean just wasn’t cut out for love. He tries to compose himself, offer some meaningful words, but his throat burns from recent use and he just tightens his leather jacket around him, nods at his now ex-boyfriend, and flees out of their shared alleyway._

_When he returns four hours later, Marco is missing along with the tattered plaid blanket that they would huddle underneath at night. The emotional weight is heavy on his shoulders, and for the first time, he gives in to the crushing feeling of desperation that has been following him around for months. At least when Marco was around, it lessened everything, but he now has to deal with it all on his own. With heavy steps, he moves to the end of the alleyway, leans against the empty dumpster, and slumps to the ground as his legs give out underneath him. He barely manages to tug his hood over his head, before he passes out from emotional exhaustion._

\---

His breathing is accelerated in clear panic, and Eren is suddenly pushing him forward just enough to climb behind him. His tanned hands gently resting on his chest, pulling him back in the cradle of his legs and encouraging Jean to breathe with him. Jean lets out a few more wheezing breaths before falling into a bout of hacking, but then he finally relaxes back into the warmth of Eren’s chest. Eren doesn’t even shift, and lets the back of Jean’s head rest on his shoulder. Eren’s long fingers tap out a random beat over his chest, and Jean appreciates how he lets them sit in silence to let Jean stew over everything.

Jean feels himself relaxing before he starts considering how odd this all is. Eren is someone he met less then an hour ago, but is someone who he allows to touch him without flying into a defensive and violent rage. He’d just gotten so used to bobbing and weaving underneath the arms of bulkier, yet less talented street kids trying to steal their supplies that he was on edge most of the time. They were constantly out in the open and his paranoia would be so high that even the softness of Marco’s fingertips would set him off negatively. Maybe that had been another reason that he had left him behind.

Eren reaches up and rubs the softness of his Henley shirtsleeve against his cheek as if trying to pull him from the negative space in his mind. Jean is about to turn his head and smile at him for the effort, but instead scrunches up his nose at the dirt that transfers from his skin to the fabric. He flushes bright red, suddenly realizing that he probably smells like shit as well and whimpers lowly in the back of his throat in pure embarrassment. Eren’s chest rumbles with a soft laugh and Jean jerks his neck just enough to glare at him.

Eren’s face softens into a slight smile, and Jean’s jaw slackens at the way it completely morphs his face. He still pushes his hands into Eren’s face, and very carefully signs: “ **you’re an asshole**.” He figures it’s the only way to keep his pride and he grins slightly at the way Eren looks confused. Jean had grown up in a household with a French mother, and his sign language is only basic high school stuff with a smattering of creative curses. He doubts even those who are fluent in sign language can recognize most of his signs because of his clumsy finger positioning, but he’s gotten better.

“I feel like you just insulted me,” Eren murmurs and Jean lets out a strain of amused laughter followed by a few raucous coughs. Eren snorts when he finally stops, and shakes his head. “You’re lucky I’ll still let you use the shower, you piece of shit.” Jean doesn’t even frown at the insult, instead sends a toothy grin in response. 


	2. Chapter 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I kept wondering if I should play with their ages or not, but then I decided that it’s an AU and so I can do whatever I want! Here’s how their ages break down so far: 
> 
> Jean – 17, almost 18  
> Armin – 18  
> Annie, Eren, Mikasa– 19
> 
> I can add the ages of the rest of the characters if you want! I just wanted jean being the baby even though, I know he’s an older recruit in the manga. :3
> 
> Also this is the first time I’ve done a fic where I get to go between the two main characters’ POV, so I hope it works all right!

Eren learned a long time ago that getting too attached to people doesn’t do any good for him. He has Mikasa and Armin, along with a random group of people who tend to drift in and out of his life. Annie is becoming a more permanent fixture, but he still doesn’t let her closer to his heart then necessary. Needless to say, he doesn’t know why he already feels so fond of this two toned hair fucker named Jean.

He’s already memorized his face, from hovering around while the kid wheezed away in his sleep. He’s noticed that Jean’s hair is growing out at old angles, and he seems to be in need of a good cut and possible dye jobs if his roots have anything to say about it. He also notices that his cheekbones look too sharp, it makes his face look starved, and it causes his gut to clench with worry. Despite all of these signs that point to delicacy, Eren also noticed Jean’s ever-clenching fists in his sleep, fingers wrapped in weathered boxing tape, not ready to give up.

“Fuck,” Eren grunts out and slams his forehead against the hard wood of the communal bathroom. Inside, Jean is showering and making soft humming noises, and he groans softly to himself because it’s cute as fuck. He should have let Armin convince Mikasa to check on Jean; Armin had always been fonder of Marco after all. Instead, he’s nursing a coil of affection that could potentially backfire on him.

The heavy echo of the front door closing pulls him out of his thoughts, and he leaves the small hallway, which houses the medium communal bathroom on one side and on the other is a slightly smaller room full of bunk beds. He steps out into the mostly open space of the rest of the warehouse, and sees his friends in the front corner by the office that houses a mini TV, a loveseat, and a game system that works only 80% of the time. Mikasa is closing the door while Armin unties his scarf, and Annie kicks off her combat boots.

Armin notices him first, cheeks reddened by cold scrunching up as he offers Eren a friendly grin. “Did you get Jean?” Eren can’t help being amused at how Armin’s mind can be so one track. When he nods, Armin’s eyes almost seem to sparkle and Eren can’t help reaching out to ruffle his hair fondly. Two seconds later, his hand is being slapped away and Armin is being tugged back into a jealous Annie’s arms. Mikasa merely rolls her eyes at her behavior and throws her coat into the open door of the office.

Eren just ignores it, used to the odd relationship between Annie, Armin, and Mikasa, and offers an amused look. “Did you guys get all the food?” He cranes his head toward the paper bags at the door, eager to dig through them, but Mikasa’s heavy stare keeps him from doing so.

“We got your cinnamon toast crunch if that’s what you’re worried about,” Mikasa sighs, and crosses the cement floor to put everything away in the cabinets of the small kitchenette. Eren grins satisfied with the answer, and then turns his attention to Annie on the couch with Armin in her lap.  Armin motions him over, and he sits on the tattered arm of the couch, waiting for him to speak again.

“What kind of condition was Jean in?” Armin questions, and cranes his head around as if looking for the younger kid. Eren waits until Armin’s attention is back on him, and snorts as Armin’s small fingers begin to twirl the ends of Annie’s hair.

Eren rubs the thinning fabric of his used Henley between his thumb and forefinger, ready to open his mouth when he hears footsteps from down the hall. All four of them automatically turn their head to see Jean shifting nervously from one bare foot to the other, clad in sweatpants that drag on the floor and an equally large black hoodie. The sleeves cover his hands, but Eren can tell that they are without the tattered fighting wraps, and Jean is clenching them nervously.

That instinctive need to protect rises in him again as Jean’s eyes shift far too quickly from person to person, and Eren knows he’s weighing the risks if he needs to take them all on. He slowly rises to his feet, and Jean’s eyes jerk over toward him, so he smiles to reassure him while he makes his way over. His steps are deliberate, and at an even pace, while he offers a comforting smile as Jean’s eyes stay rooted on him. Once he gets close enough, he cups the back of Jean’s nape and strokes his fingers against the damp hair there until Jean’s eyes close like a content kitten.

“It’s alright,” he murmurs, and lets Jean drop his forehead to his shoulder. “You’re safe here.” Jean snorts, obviously embarrassed, and Eren can feel the skin on his nape flushing, and shit this asshole keeps getting cuter. “Hey fuck you, I’m trying to comfort you here!”

Jean lets out a little laugh, all of the tenseness leaving his body, and Eren can’t help the grin that forms on his face in response. He lets him pull back, and catches the flush on his ears, on his cheeks, and even on his neck, and Eren clears his throat before looking away. “Jean this is Armin, Mikasa, and Annie,” he states, pointing at each to distract himself and almost groans at the odd looks each of them are throwing at him in turn.

Armin is the first to snap out of it, and he grins brightly at Jean. “It’s so nice to meet you!” He states, still perched on Annie’s lap, but looking like he’s ready to climb over the couch in his over eagerness.

Mikasa merely throws a polite nod, and moves to sit next to both Armin and Annie, placing her arm around both of her lovers with ease. Annie casts a look, and then glances away, but lets her body fall back into Mikasa in a show of their mutual relationship. Armin snorts at this, used to the girls’ behavior that borders on over possessive, and offers Jean another smile.

Jean smiles weakly, like he’s unused to doing so, and offers a wave in greeting. Once again, he doesn’t talk, and Eren remembers Marco had mentioned that Jean hasn’t in a long time. Eren can’t help wondering what his voice would sound like. He’s leaning more toward low, stubborn, and a touch on the constantly annoyed side. He stops his train of thought before he gets even creepier, and instead reaches out to tug Jean by his wrist to the kitchenette.

“Ignore them, they’re the weirdest people,” he fake-whispers to Jean, and grins when Jean makes an equally fake shocked expression. “Don’t look at them, they’ll take your soul,” he stated dramatically, letting go the fabric of Jean’s sweatshirt, and turning back to Jean with a wiggle of his eyebrows.

“Stop poisoning him!” Armin shouts from the couch, now laying across his girlfriends’ lap and kicking the arm of the sofa. It falls to the floor with a sudden clutter, which is followed by a muffled ‘shit’ from Armin, and then Jean bursts out into a peal of raspy laughter that ends up turning into a series of harsh coughs. From the corner of his eye, Eren can see Annie and Mikasa jerk in worry despite themselves. He knew they couldn’t resist the cuteness of Jean, and Jean’s rough coughs only ups their sentiment.

Eren just smiles to himself and rubs his fingers over Jean’s knuckles when the other manages to calm himself down to a slight wheeze. “Let’s get you something to eat,” he murmurs and Jean nods in reply.

\---

After Jean eats almost Eren’s entire box of cinnamon toast crunch, which Eren allowed with only minimal grumbling, Eren leads him to one of the spare bunks to sleep.  Jean had been swaying on the counter, falling asleep, and Eren had been worried that he was going to fall face forward into the cement floor. Eren makes sure he’s comfortable, and offers to hang the hoodie on the back of the door, but Jean just grumbles and curls deeper into the thick duvet with the hood pulled halfway over his face. Seconds later, he’s completely passed out, and Eren can’t help but be amazed.

Before leaving, Eren touches the back of his hand to Jean’s forehead, feeling the presence of a light fever, and sighs faintly. Hopefully by tomorrow, it will be broken and Jean will be closer to better health. From his limited medical knowledge, which he had scrounged from his asshole father, Jean seems to have a mild case of bronchitis.

Quietly closing the door behind him, he heads back to the common area where Armin is waiting for him. He knows Armin has been bursting to get answers since they were interrupted by Jean’s entrance, and Eren was surprised he had been able to wait so long. He holds up a finger, grabs himself a bottle of water, and takes up Jean’s previous position on the kitchenette counter.

“So he doesn’t talk, seems to be sick, and is nervous around people?” Armin phrases it like a question even though he has observed all of these things. Armin is like that though, and Eren think he does it sometimes out of some odd sense of politeness, like he’s ashamed of being smarter then a lot of them. Eren doesn’t like that characteristic of him, but doesn’t try to question it either because he has a feeling it has something to do with Armin’s past. Armin rarely speaks about his past even after years of close friendship, and Eren can’t fault him for that; he doesn’t talk about his past much either.

Taking a quick sip to gather his thoughts together, Eren pauses to reach out and adjust some messy strands of Armin’s hair. He glances around and notices that both Annie and Mikasa must be elsewhere to give them time to talk; they know Armin will fill them in later whether they want to know or not. “I think he can talk, but doesn’t,” Eren begins, twisting and untwisting the cap of his water bottle to keep himself busy. “I think it might be trauma related, but he seems to know some sign language, but not enough. His fingers seem clumsy when he tries to do certain signs.”

Armin hums, gazing briefly at the tall ceiling to regain his thoughts, and then gazing back at Eren. “He probably doesn’t have a lot of experience with it then, the loss of his voice must be recent,” he proclaims and then toes the ground with his sock clad foot. “I can help him with sign language, my grandfather used to be deaf,” he whispers it and Eren treasures his ability to share this secret out loud, how he wants to dig up piece of his past to help a complete stranger.

“Thank you,” Eren whispers, equally as soft so that he doesn’t break the moment. Armin keeps his head slightly bowed, lost in unearthed memories, and Eren bites his lower lip guiltily. “Look Armin,” he begins, but stops when the younger boy snaps his head up, and gives him a hard look.

“I wouldn’t offer if I couldn’t do it,” Armin protests, just loud enough that both Annie and Mikasa peek their heads around the corner of the office until Armin shoos them off. “Sorry, I just…”

Eren just nods to show his understanding and takes a long gulp out of his water bottle. “I know, you hate when people try to baby you,” he supplies and then takes a moment to tug his left leg over his right to get more comfortable. Armin smiles at him, and he returns it while playing with the tattered ends of his flannel pajama pants.

“Was there anything else?” Armin questions.

“I think he used to a fighter of some type, boxer or martial artist, I’m not really sure, but maybe ask Annie if she’d fight with him? I think the psychical activity could be good for him, it would also be a good bonding experience for him.” Eren also thinks that if Jean can get closer to those around him then they’ll have a better chance of him staying. Letting him back on the streets, with all the formed gangs and no support, would be a fate worse then death.

Armin seems to pick up on this, and nods. “I’m sure she won’t mind, but I’ll have her get back to you on that.” With that he lets out a content sigh, less worried now that he knows Jean is all right. Armin is the type of person to take on other people’s responsibilities and Marco had unceremoniously dumped Jean on his small shoulders. Eren is about to voice his respect for that aspect of his friend’s personality when Armin’s expression turns mischievous, and Eren groans out loud.

“No, no, no!” He shouts, launching himself off the counter before Armin can open his mouth. “Don’t even do it!”

Armin giggles, cheeks flushing with pleasure at the sight of a flustered Eren. It’s been a rare sight lately, and Eren knows that all of them enjoy it. “It’s just cute to see you with a crush is all,” he states as innocently as possible and Eren bristles like a cat, hissing through his teeth. “Look at that cute little face,” Armin coos, and Eren gets even more flustered when he hears laughter from the office.

“All of you are heathens!” He shouts dramatically, and storms toward where Jean is asleep to collapse as well. He almost turns around when he hears Mikasa ask, “Does he even know what heathens mean?” but instead speeds up to avoid replying.

“Idiots,” he mutters fondly and moves to stand next to Jean’s bunk. The youth is snoring airily, duvet kicked to the end of the bed, and hoodie plus t-shirt scrunched up to show the contrast of pale stomach and the darkness of his happy trail. Eren flushes, and averts his gaze from the flatness of his abdomen and then moves to tug the duvet back into place. “Sleeps like a little kid,” he mutters and then crawls into the bed across from Jean’s. His usual bed is the one on top of Jean’s, but it doesn’t feel right to keep the kid out of his line of sight especially when he’s sick.

Tugging the blanket over his shoulders, he pillows his arms underneath his head and angles his body in Jean’s direction. He tells himself he always sleeps on his right side, that he wouldn’t feel more comfortable if he was shoved against the wall, and manages to fall asleep before he can think up his third denial.


	3. Chapter 3

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I just want to thank everyone for being so sweet and supportive! I was very nervous at first about writing fanfiction after such a long time away, but all of you guys have been so lovely! Whether you have left kudos, silently glanced over the story, or left a review, I just want you all to know I appreciate you so much! 
> 
> I’m sorry for all the exclamation points, I’m just so touched. :3
> 
> This chapter is kind of more Jean bonding with Armin and Mikasa, but I’ll get him to bond with Annie and put in more Eren/Jean scenes in next time too. I hope no one minds this.

_“ Your father and I don’t love each other anymore,” his mother announces to him, voice as even as when she tells him to eat the crust on his bread. He takes a few minutes to process it, confused why she’s telling him such horrible news in their shared secret language, which is only meant for beautiful things; he’s even more confused by the fact that people can simply stop loving each other._

_His mother lets him roll this around in his head, small legs slicing through the humid air as they sit outside their rundown house on their equally rundown porch. His father is at the neighbor’s, watching American football, and their shared screams sail across the shimmery asphalt and into his ears. He’s merely five, and he feels like this is too much for his mind to handle even though his parents tell him he is much smarter then other children his age. He turns to face her, and feels disturbed when her expression remains stoic._

_“Are you getting a divorce?” He questions, using English instead of French on purpose, and gets a little flustered when he stutters over the word divorce. “Who will I live with?” He hopes that whomever he lives with gets a nice new house; he really hates their current house. The windows make a whistling noise whenever a wind blows through, the linoleum is peeling up, and his room is the size of a closet; those are just a few of the problems he has with it._

_“Don’t be stupid, Jean,” she sighs out and taps a random beat on the side of the splintered doorframe. “Your father and I don’t have enough money for that; divorces along with houses cost a lot,” and a bitter smile suddenly forms on her face._

_That smile haunts him again twelve years later; it mirrors the one that curls over her lips when he announces that he is in love with another boy. She never says anything to him as his father shouts to the heavens like it could take back his gay son and give him a better one, but he still hears her voice so clearly in his head when their eyes meet. “ Your father and I don’t love you anymore,” it whispers in their shared secret language, voice as even as when she tells him not to break curfew, and that is the moment that Jean’s throat closes up involuntarily._

\--- 

Jean wakes up with a gasp that feels shaky around the edges, much like his own mind as he comes out of a memory turned nightmare. He feels suffocated, overheated, and muggy, and hastily kicks off the blankets and then decides to also rip the hoodie over his head. The room is quiet, aside from the soft, even breathing of the four others, relieved that he hasn’t woken anyone up. He can make out each bed, thanks to the light coming in from the hall, the door left half way open, and sees that Annie, Mikasa, and Armin have pushed two beds together. They are wrapped around each other like a pile of puppies, content while Eren lays in the bed across from him, a hand underneath his head and one of his legs reaching out into the aisle.

He scrubs his hands over his face, trying to get the tightness underneath his skin to dissipate. Before he can pull his hands away, he feels the end of the bed bend under a sudden weight. It shocks him because he hadn’t heard any movement, and when he jerks his gaze up, he’s even more shocked to meet Mikasa’s unwavering gaze.

She’s hard to read, but there isn’t coldness in her eyes, and Jean can’t help the way his eyes water at her presence. He’s not the type to cry, hasn’t since who knows when, but the way she looks at him causes him to let out a small, helpless sob. Mikasa lets her hand hover over his covered knee as a sign of support, not wanting to invade his space or intrude on his break down, but he just cries a little louder, and she scoots over, frantic to comfort in any way. 

Her hand moves to touch the back of his neck, but pulls away when he flinches violently. Instead, he feels her watching him as he curls up close to her body to leech off her warmth, but far enough away that he isn’t brushing up against her. One of his hands is covering his face, keeping Mikasa out of his sight, or maybe keeping her from seeing the mess that he is.  Either way, she remains until his cries fade into wheezing breaths, not even shifting an inch.

“You’re okay now,” Mikasa whispers into the air, and Jean nods his sticky face against the comforter, too tired to move or even be embarrassed. He feels, as cliché as it is, much lighter now that he’s released some of his stress even if his head is pounding. “Can you go back to sleep?” 

Jean motions to his face and head, hoping she understands that he can’t without washing up and drinking some water, but Mikasa is so observant that she catches on easily. She slides away from him, making sure not to move too fast and startle him, and motions for him to lie still. She comes back a few moments later, as silently as she disappeared, with a wet cloth in one hand and a water bottle in the other. 

He props himself up just as she sits on the edge of the bed, not wanting to be mothered anymore, but gives her a smile that he hopes speaks of his levels of gratitude. It probably just comes off as awkward and embarrassed, because he’s feeling that as well, but Mikasa just gives a solemn nod and moves to back to her shared bed. Jean’s kind of amazed at how she can read a situation and react to it so well, but maybe he’s more obvious then he thought. 

He wipes his face, taking care not to irritate the skin of his puffy eyes, and then takes slow sips from the water bottle. He’s just about to attempt sleep again, when he feels a gaze on him, and jerks his head around only to meet Eren’s eyes in the semi-darkness. His breathing hitches, and he feels goose bumps begin to form on his bare arms, but he can’t seem to even move as Eren continues to examine him.

Eren takes care of it for him though, and kicks off his blankets before moving to sit on Jean’s bed. The back of his hand tests the temperature of his forehead, and Jean reaches up to push his wrist away, but before he can, Eren moves his hand down to cup his cheek. “Are you okay?” He whispers into the air between them, and Jean nods shyly.

Jean feels so vulnerable, this is the third time that Eren has caught him being weak, and yet the other doesn’t seem to judge him. In fact, none of them do, and it makes his heart clench because he feels he doesn’t deserve these selfless people, feels he’s not good enough for them.

“Stop it,” Eren commands, voice rough with more then just sleep. He tilts Jean’s head up, warm fingertips curled underneath his chin. “You’re going to hurt your head with those dark, heavy thoughts asshole,” he states, and Jean laughs in response. “There we go,” Eren soothes, and then turns to situate the pillows behind him.

Jean watches, until Eren suddenly tugs him down, and Jean squawks as he lands. His position is awkward, legs straddling either side of Eren’s lap with his ass pushing out, and his face squashed into Eren’s collarbone. He pulls back, and sneers at Eren, only for the other to snort and tug Jean into a laying position that is half on him. 

“You’re so fucking bony,” Eren complains and Jean stabs him with his elbow in the shorter male’s ribs. Eren swats his shoulder, and wriggles around to get them more comfortable before tugging the blankets over them. Jean ends up with his legs tangled with Eren’s, and his head on his chest. He expects it to be odd, to be laying with a human after wincing away from everyone else for so long, but instead he melts against him. He can’t pinpoint why Eren is the only one to make him relax, but he just nuzzles into the softness of his t-shirt and falls asleep, far too tired to figure it out.

\---

Jean wakes up with the room empty, and his body just about to fall off the mattress. He rubs at his eyes, trying to remove any sleep dust, and notices some folded clothing on the bed across from him. He slips off the bed, and changes into the white tank top, denim button up that fits a little tight across the shoulders, and a black pair of jeans that have holes on both knees. Without a brush or comb in sight, he scrubs his fingers through his hair to get it into some sort of order. He leaves his feet bare, and begins to walk toward the open area to check if anyone is around. 

His eyes immediately land on Armin’s flaxen locks, and he smiles in greeting. Armin is perched on the unbroken arm of the couch, one of his legs pulled to his chest, and the other left dangling with his clothed toes almost touching the cement floor. He’s wearing a teal sweater with a collared shirt underneath plus a pair of blue jeans. Armin jumps up at the sight of him, and flashes a smile so genuine and sweet that Jean has to avert his eyes. 

“Eren, Misaka, and Annie are at work so it’s just going to be you and I today!” Armin exclaims, moving to the kitchenette and digging out a plate from the microwave. It has a sloppily made egg and ham sandwich on it, and Armin reaches into the fridge to put an array of fresh fruit on it. “This is for you, don’t worry Annie made it and she’s actually very talented with cooking.”

Jean takes it with a perfunctory nod, not awake enough to process much, and lets Armin guide him toward the small office in the front. There is a desk of sort jammed into the back corner, so Jean sits on the mismatched chair and lets out a nervous snort when it squeaks underneath his weight. Armin turns on the small television to a random news network, and turns away to let Jean eat in private, which he’s thankful for. His mother had always been the type to hover when he was eating, and it had turned him into a person who hated being watched when dining.

He finishes fast, not wanting to make Armin wait on him, and moves to sit by him on the navy and white striped love seat. It almost looks brand new, and he can’t help running his palm down the silky fabric. When he’s finished, he turns to see Armin watching with a gentle shimmer in his eyes, and Jean feels warmth spread through him that he couldn’t quite identify. He clumsily signs: “ **thank you”** and hopes that Armin understands it’s for more then just the food.

Armin smiles, and signs back with much more ease then Jean can: “ **you’re welcome**.” Jean blinks, surprised, and Armin laughs very lightly. “Do you want me to teach you sign language?” Armin is gentle about the request, like he doesn’t want to offend Jean, and Jean nods eagerly as not to disappoint him.

\---

Armin turns out to be a passionate teacher that pushes Jean even when he wants to throw himself on the floor and give up. Jean is usually the type to catch on quick, but his fingers don’t seem want to cooperate with him most of the time. His stomach growls just as the heavy front door opens, and he rushes off to see whom it is before Armin dismisses him.

Jean can’t help grinning when he sees Eren in the doorway, his hair dusted with snow from outside. Eren chuckles at the sight of him, and unwinds the scarf from around his neck before throwing it right in Jean’s face. “Are you causing trouble?” He questions, and Jean throws the scarf on the ground to give him a nasty glare in reply. “I guess that’s a no,” Eren murmurs and takes off his leather jacket to reveal a shockingly orange band t-shirt that even seems to clash with his jeans. 

“ **That shirt is fucking ugly,** ” he signs and can feel his nose scrunched up in disgust. Armin’s laugh from behind him causes him to turn around, and he grins at him as innocently as possible. 

“What did he say?” Eren questions, his voice a touch higher as if panicked that Jean is talking shit, which of course – he is. Eren comes up behind him and slings his arm around his waist, tugging him against him. “You little shit,” he says as both Jean and Armin burst into laughter, though Jean stops to let out a few coughs. He feels both Eren and Armin’s eyes on him in concern, but he waves his hands in annoyance to make them stop.

“Anyways, he said your shirt is fucking ugly, and I completely agree,” Armin says, and runs off before Eren can do anything to him, disappearing into the communal bathroom. 

Jean lets out a whoosh of air as both Eren’s hands slide over his ribs, and he can feel himself starting to blush from the somewhat intimate contact. Before he can crane his head, and figure out what the fuck Eren is doing, Eren’s fingers start to dig into his ribs and cause him to jerk away. The feeling isn’t ticklish, but an almost nervous spark that makes his heart to pound wildly, he doesn’t know if it’s because in boxing you’re supposed to protect your ribs or because Eren’s fingers feel hot even through two layers of clothing. 

Eren watches him, a little furrow between his brows as he tries to figure out if Jean is offended or not. Apparently, Eren finds what he needs, and cuffs the side of his head with his knuckles. Fuck, how is this asshole so cool?

Jean sticks his tongue out at him, and moves to the kitchen to scrounge up a late lunch. Eren soon follows, purposely bumping him as he moves around the small area, and steals Jean’s sandwich for a quick bite when he’s done making it. Jean elbows him to get him to stop, stealing it back and taking a large bite out of it to show Eren that it belongs to him.

Eren only blinks at him, a faint blush rising on his cheeks, barely seen thanks to the darker shade of his skins. Jean stops mid-chew, wondering what the cause of it is, and cocks his head to the side. The bread starts to get soggy in his mouth though, so he keeps chewing and then swallows while Eren’s brain takes the few seconds to restart.

“Glad to see you’re back to being your shitty self,” Eren offers instead of an explanation for his odd behavior, and Jean decides to let it slide. Even though, he feels more comfortable around Eren then anyone else, he doesn’t feel close enough to push him for answers, so he offers an exaggerated sneer instead.

“Tomorrow you’re coming to work with me, Levi says he has a position open for you,” Eren says and Jean feels anxiety rise in him, even though he knows the least he can do is earn some cash to help out. Who is this Levi? What does he have to do? Eren must sense his rising panic because he steps forward and plays with the hair at his nape.

“Levi owns a book store, and I’m going to assume he just wants you to stock and maybe smile occasionally. You’ll stun the little old ladies, and school girls alike,” Eren says. Jean snorts and shakes his head to contradict him, but Eren just pinches the back of his neck to stop him. Jean yelps, and glares up at him, but Eren doesn’t look apologetic or amused. “We’ll have to get your hair fixed up first, I’m sure Krista can slot us in, our shift isn’t until noon.”

Jean can’t help the pleased smile that comes over his lips at the thought of his hair being fixed up, and Eren rolls his eyes when he catches sight of it. “Having your hair fucked up for so long must have been really pissing you off, huh?” Jean shoves him out of the way, and moves away to finish up his sandwich. 

He can’t help the grateful tears that suddenly prick at his eyes, but makes sure that no one sees them as he paces around, eating the sandwich a little quicker then he normally would. It helps him to keep the tears at bay even if he still feels like crying when he’s devoured it. So when he’s finished, he scrubs his face to get rid of the crumbs, along with discretely rubbing at his eyes. He waits a few extra seconds, and turns his thoughts to his new haircut instead. When he turns around, Eren is watching, but just offers a gentle smile, and Jean feels like he could stay here indefinitely with these kind people around him.


	4. Chapter 4

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I was having such a hard time writing this chapter, probably because I was trying to plan it too much probably. Like I was trying to plan out a kiss scene, and I realized there is NO way that Jean is ready for that yet, and Eren would not take advantage of that. I guess I just want to say, I am dying to write a kiss scene, but my mind won’t let me until the moment is right. :(
> 
> I’m trying to keep this story on an update schedule of every Friday, but next week might be a little late since I’m going on a trip. I’ll try to avoid this though!
> 
> P.S. this chapter was going to be longer, but I wanted to write meeting Levi in Jean’s POV so it’s a bit shorter then usual.

Eren’s internal clock wakes him up at exactly 7:45, and he rolls over to see Jean curled underneath the covers with only a tuft of hair in sight. He smiles to himself, and then rolls to get out of bed and gather a new set of clothes. Mikasa, Armin, and Annie’s bed has already been made, and he glances around the corner to see if any of them are around. He hears the television on in the small office, but can’t see anyone since the blinds are closed. He decides to take a shower instead of checking in, and by the time he’s finished and dressed, he comes out and is surprised to see Annie making French toast along with bacon.

“Didn’t have work today?” He towel dries his hair and leans his jean-clad hip against the side of the wall, watching her. Annie works at Petra’s Bakery as one of the bakers, and so she usually has to wake up at around 5 AM to get to work on time. Today, she’s still in her pajamas, and looking content to cook over their portable burners.

“No, Petra had one of her insomnia fits and finished everything.” Eren can’t tell if she was joking or not, since her humor is so subtle, so he just takes the plate that is handed to him. Annie pauses, looking for Jean, but puts his plate of food into the microwave when she realizes he’s still sleeping. This little act of kindness causes Eren to turn around so she can’t see the smile spreading across his lips.

They both move into the small office and begin to chow down. It’s quiet as usual, but when Annie finishes she turns to look at him instead of leaving with her empty dish. Eren looks up at her after finishing his last piece of bacon. She’s watching him and takes the dish from him, but just puts them on the floor. She turns to face him while situating herself into a cross-legged position.

“Look,” she begins, voice gruff and embarrassed, “I’ve seen kids like Jean, and you have to be careful. He’s shielded himself for so long that now he’s getting attached to you and on top of that; he’s touch starved, so you shouldn’t feed it if you’re not serious.” Eren finds it amusing how fast Annie has gotten protective of Jean, but listens anyways because her concerns are valid. “It’s just you’ve never had a serious relationship, you get a crush and get over it quickly, so be careful because I think Jean is falling for you,” she breaks it off, looking back toward the kitchen as she hears footsteps.

Jean is moving into the kitchen, his shirt hitched up as he scratches at his chest. His eyes are closed as he sways from foot to foot, still half asleep. Annie motions for him to get Jean, and Eren flashes her a grateful smile, taking the dishes from her hands and sneaking up on the younger boy.  He decides that he needs to be taught a lesson for showing off his attractive yet scrawny body, and grins when he looks down at the fork on his plate.

Jean makes a small squeak when Eren rubs a dirty fork on his side, and nearly falls down, but Eren catches him by the elbow. “You’re so stupid when you just wake up,” he says and can’t help feeling smitten. Jean glares, notices the dirty fork in his hand, and then squeals in disgust. Eren can’t help laughing hysterically as Jean rubs the stickiness of the syrup from his ribs.

He stops when Jean elbows him for the third time, and rubs his soon to be bruised left side. “Look Annie left you some in the microwave heat it up, take a quick shower, and then we have to your hairdresser appointment,” he says, and shakes his head as Jean does a weird dance as he almost trips over his too long pajama pants.

\--- 

Eren winds his scarf around his neck, and then slides on his buttery leather gloves. He turns toward Jean, and reaches up to straighten the beanie on his head, and checks to make sure he also has on his borrowed gloves and scarf. He pulls back, and notices the light dusting of pink over Jean’s cheek and chokes at the picture of cuteness that he makes, especially when wearing one of Eren’s favorite t-shirts. “Come on you idiot,” he says gruffly and drags him outside to his beat up Honda motorcycle.

Jean tugs back, and Eren turns around to see he’s got a nervous look on his face. “Don’t worry, the bike is fine. Armin has been helping me fix it up and that kid is pretty much a genius,” he says, and that seems to reassure him well enough. He hands him the extra helmet, straps his own on, and climbs on to start up the engine. Jean gets behind him a few seconds later, limbs shaky from nerves, and Eren can’t help the smile that tugs at his lips. He reaches back to grab both of his arms, and clamp them around his waist, and Jean collapses against his back as soon as he revs the engine.

“Fucking adorable,” he mutters beneath his breath, and Jean makes an inquisitive noise, having felt the vibrations, but he kicks away the stand to distract him. Jean reacts just as expected, gripping tightly and hiding his face in his shoulder. He can feel his own cheeks flushing from more then just the cold.

It takes them 20 minutes before he’s parked in front of the salon that Krista works at. When he shuts off the engine, Jean jumps off and throws his helmet on the back of the bike. He has a more pronounced pout to his lips then usual, and Eren chuckles at the sight of it.

“Stop pouting you dick,” he says as he takes Jean’s hand, his actions reflecting his true nature. He drags him across the doorway, and into the cozy deco of Squeaky Clean salon. Eren had been trying to get them to change the name forever, but could never come with a better name off the top of his head. It also didn’t help that Mike likes it when people groan at the corny name.

“Eren!” Krista calls, and runs at them with a smile so wide on her face that Eren can practically see sparkles dancing around her. He glances at Jean, and he’s blinking rapidly like he has just been blinded by her brilliance. “Is this Jean?” She asks when she comes to stop in front of them, and motions Jean to bend down. He obeys as soon as the shock wears off, and Krista takes the beanie off his head to inspect his hair. “Okay so let’s dye this part, I have a color chart you can chose from, and we’ll trim the ends and reshape the back?"

Jean nods, and Krista hums, leading him toward her station. Jean shoots him a backward glance, like a nervous puppy, and Eren can’t help following them. He throws himself on the empty chair that belongs to one of the other hairdresser’s and watches as Krista flutters around, getting ready to start on Jean’s hair. Jean puts on the cape when she throws it at him, and Eren laughs as Jean’s nose scrunches up at the cheetah print.

“Not a fan?” Eren asks, and Jean shakes his head firmly. Eren just shakes his head, digs out one of the celebrity rag magazines on the station in front of him, and flips through the pages. He begins to zone out right as Krista brings a book full of hair shades for Jean to pick for his hair, and rubs his thumb over the corner of the magazine.

Eren realizes that this half-way communication he’s doing with Jean isn’t going to work out for too long especially because he wants to learn more about him. He doesn’t want to intrude on Jean and Armin’s bonding time though, since they seem to be getting closer. That left him two options: to intrude on Mikasa’s and Annie’s Armin time or to book learn it. Neither of them seemed particularly great options, but one of them involved less anger from two of the most terrifying women he’s ever met.

He jerks out of his thoughts when a large hand lands on his shoulder, and glances up to see that Krista has led Jean off to the dryer station, and that Mike is standing directly behind him. “Hey Mike,” he says and turns the chair around to face him without having to stand up.

Mike inclines his head in greeting, before pointing in the direction of Jean with a curious look on his face. “That the kid that hangs around the Piggly Wiggly? The one that always smells like cloves.” Eren can’t fight the weirded out look that crosses over his face even though he should be used to Mike’s habit of smelling anyone.

“Yeah he used to hang out there with that freckled fucker, Marco,” Eren replies. It’s weird, Eren never had a problem with Marco before, but just the fact that anyone would do anything to hurt Jean puts him on edge. “He’s staying with us now, Levi is letting him work for him, and it’s going to be his first day so I wanted to make sure his hair didn’t look like shit.”

Mike is giving him a knowing look, and Eren squirms around in the seat, as he gradually gets more and more uncomfortable. “You can stop now,” Eren says, a little louder then considered polite, and shrinks as Krista and, even Jean underneath the blower, shoot him a look of concern. “You’re creeping me out, you enjoy doing that don’t you?”

Mike looks amused, and shrugs his shoulders. “Working my way up to the number one creep of Trost, it’s time for me to take Hanji’s title,” he says with a dry tone, and then turns to leave Eren to stew over Mike and his weird ways.

\---

Somehow, Eren ends up nodding off, and is awoken by Krista’s excited squeal. He opens his eyes to see her doing a little jig around her chair, and he yawns to get rid of the last remains of sleep. When he turns around, he sees Jean’s new hair and his spine goes ramrod straight. Jean’s hair has a gorgeous contrast of blonde and black along with it being parted to one side that to show off his undercut. Not only is the hair cut incredibly attractive on Jean, but also so is the new confidence that it instills in him. Jean is holding his chin higher, and his shoulders aren’t raised high enough that they brush his earlobes. For the first time, Eren finally realizes that Jean is taller then him, and instead of feeling offended, feels a twisted coil of heat in his lower stomach.

Jean notices him watching and gives him a smirk that borders on smug, tilting his chin higher like he’s preening from the ogling – not that Eren will admit to ogling him. “Your hair is significantly less shitty,” Eren acknowledges and Jean gives him a subdued smile that is still full of sweetness, which makes Eren feel hot underneath the collar. This kid is not good for his health.

Krista giggles in the background, and Eren shoots her a look a step below a glare. No one glares at Krista, it’s against the law, and he also doesn’t want Ymir sneaking up on him in a back alley. “You are adorable,” she coos, and rushes off to write the check before either of them can object verbally or otherwise.

Jean is adjusting his black gauges and not looking Eren in the eye, and Eren rights the situation by clamping his hand on his shoulder. “It’s almost twelve so we have to go for our shift,” he says and makes his way to the front desk, dropping down the appropriate amount of cash including a nice tip for Krista even if she had teased the both of them. Jean makes a protesting noise, and Eren just shoots him a look that shuts him up. He wants to treat Jean, and he doesn’t know how long he’ll have Jean around so he plans to do it as much as possible.  

“Come back in again soon, okay? Also call me soon so we can all hang out!” Krista calls to their backs as they leave, and Jean nods furiously, trying hard not to offend her. Eren just waves without turning around and leads Jean to the motorcycle again. The bookstore is only two streets over, but he’ll get a ticket if he leaves his bike out front, and it’s also rather fun to have Jean clinging to his back even when he’s only going 30.

“It’s almost 12, so we’ll stop at work. First rule, never be late because Levi will kill you with his eyes,” he says as he climbs onto the bike. “Second rule, don’t make a mess because Levi will kill you with his eyes.” He straps his helmet on, and looks over his shoulder at Jean on the sidewalk. “You’re lucky you came around after Erwin and him started dating because before he would throw the last Harry Potter book at your head, and that shit hurt.”

Jean’s eyes crackle as he grins in amusement, before he straps on his helmet as well and wraps his arms tightly around Eren’s waist. “If you follow those two rules, you should be fine.” With that, he revs the engine of the bike and sets off around the corner to the Wings of Freedom bookstore.


	5. Chapter 5

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I’m sorry for the late update, I’ll try and make sure it doesn’t happen again! 
> 
> Wow five chapters feels like such an accomplishment. I really didn’t even know if I should post this in the first place, but here we are! The note below is just me rambling about Jean so you can skip it!
> 
> A little introspection on Jean in this story: he’s the type of character that, so far, has settled. Like with his parents, they obviously didn’t treat him well and were divorced, but he figured he was better off then other kids who parents never got to see their parents and didn’t complain. So with the rare praise his parents gave him, he dubbed himself as their golden boy since they never were as bad as they could be? And because of this attitude with his parents, he also settled with his relationship with Marco, which wasn’t healthy either – but in a different way. I’ll hopefully explain this in later chapters, and no it’s not just going to be making Marco into a bad guy.

Jean has decided that he really hates motorcycles. He feels like his legs are going to smash into something at any minute when he’s on them, the air rushing past him makes him shiver, and it’d be so easy to fall off on those quick turns. The only positive that he can think of is that, he gets to cling to Eren. Jean is finding out that he enjoys Eren’s skin that is almost too warm and the way Eren glances back at him whenever they stop, even if Eren is amused by his cowardly behavior.

When they finally arrive at their destination, Jean stumbles of the back of the bike before Eren can even throw up the kickstand. Scuffling his boots on the ground, Jean’s fingers fumble with the strap of his helmet, and he shoves the item onto Eren when he manages to take it off. Jean pauses though to watch him, how Eren’s leather jacket is tight across his broad shoulders and the tempting line of his tanned neck. Eren snaps him out of it by flicking him on the ear, and Jean hisses at him from both the pain of being flicked and the embarrassment of being caught staring.

Eren shoots him a cocky smirk, and motions for Jean to follow him into the small bookstore. The outside makes it look quaint with the bay windows, and wooden paneling. Jean finds himself immediately liking it, and that feeling only increases when he steps over the ‘Be Quiet’ doormat. He pauses after entering, and feels his shoulders relax at the comforting atmosphere. The bookcases are all in rows, and made of dark wood, plus they are tall enough that they block out your neighbor in the aisle next to you. On top of this, there are various little nooks for hiding out and reading through out; the one closest to him is a missing spot between bookcases with mismatched pillows shoved in. Jean almost walks over toward it, but Eren’s hand falls on his wrist and he drags him toward the left side of the store where the cash registers are.

Behind the counter is a short male with an unpleasant expression who is thumbing through a fashion magazine. He looks up when they stop in front of the counter, and gives the both of them an unimpressed once over. He scratches underneath the left sleeve of his rolled up oxford shirt, and drops the magazine on the counter. “At least you shits bothered to show up on time,” he sneers and steps out from behind the counter to motion to Eren. “Take over the counter, I need to tell this unnaturally tall freak what to do so I can get to lunch on time with Erwin.”

Jean feels gob smacked because Levi has such a commanding presence about him, and he shoots one last nervous look at Eren before trailing behind the smaller male. He can feel Eren’s gaze between his shoulder blades until Levi leads him into the back room.

“Heard about your inability to speak, but I have tons of books that need to be sorted and put away, so as long as you know the alphabet and can put stuff in the correct genres; you’ll be fine.” Levi states everything in a manner so straightforward that it borders on harsh, but Jean finds it more comforting then scary. Levi points at a stock of books in the corner of the room near the metal backdoor. There is also a mini fridge, a table big enough for four, and a dimpled trashcan. The walls are a cinnamon color with crooked pieces of artwork that he can’t place on them, and Jean wonders if they are from a local artist. “By the way, do you happen to speak and/or read French?”

Jean turns back to look at him, and nods to show that he does indeed speak and read French. He makes a motion for small, to show Levi that it had been his first language, and Levi is quick to catch on.

“Is your mother Evangeline? You look a bit like her,” Levi almost looks a bit cautious when he mentions it, which Jean imagines doesn’t fit him at all, so Jean masks the way his heart twinges and nods. “She comes in occasionally, will it be a problem?”

Jean snorts, and swallows thickly. He wishes it would be a problem, but he knows that his mother would just ignore him. He shakes his head, and moves toward the boxes to begin picking up a couple of books, not wanting to continue this line of talking. He can feel his hands shaking, but he hopes if Levi does notice that the other doesn’t comment.

“Anyways, there are some old books here that are purely in French so if you want to borrow them, then that’s fine.” Jean can’t help smiling a bit at the gruffness of Levi’s tone, and nods his head. “Just don’t fuck it up, I already have more faith in you then that shitty brat in the front.”

Jean lets out a weak laugh, and watches the intimidating male saunter out of the room and he collapses to the floor when the door shuts behind him. He rips the beanie off his head, feeling too hot and a little weak, and he’s hoping that no one comes in to find him like this. He stares at the analog clocks, timing his breathing with the soft ticks of the second hands, and manages to get his breathing under control before it even gets to sixty clicks. He rakes his fingers through his hair, getting into a controllable chaos, and then takes off his leather jacket and scarf to throw both on the aqua colored coat rack. He takes a few more seconds to straighten out any imaginary wrinkles on his burrowed shirt, and grabs a stack of books to begin his day. He doesn’t want Eren getting worried and coming to check up on him after all, he worries Eren enough.

He sneaks out, and notices that several people are brimming around, some of them on their lunch break and looking for a retreat and others just random kids that are either skipping class or college kids from the town over. Some of them cast glances at him as well, and he directs his gaze to the floor to deter them from speaking to him. Soon, he’s letting his thoughts drift as he cracks open the box of books, and begins to organize them on the cart as Damien Rice plays quietly in the background of the bookshop.

\--- 

“Jean!” A scream of his name breaks through the bookstore, and Jean jumps so suddenly that the bookcase in front of him almost falls when he slams his head into the side of it. He’s crouched low, making small noises that resemble whimpers more then groans, when someone tries to tug him into a back hug. He wriggles away, hissing like a cat, and turns around to glare at none other then his old neighbor Sasha Braus. She still looks the same from when she was the snotty brat who chased him around the block with a fake bow and arrow set. She had lived on that crappy street until he turned thirteen, and her fourteen, when her parents made some nice cash off selling their hunting shop. After that, Sasha tried to keep their friendship together, but Jean’s mother told him that it would be weird now that she was rich, and Jean had let her drift out to people that he thought were better for her.

She pulls back, noticing his discomfort, but her smile remains megawatt, and Jean offers her a light one in reply. Her hair is longer and pulled back into a sleek ponytail with a blue bow, and her outfit consists of a jean skirt with thick black leggings plus a white crew neck top and a black cardigan. He can’t help but think of her as beautiful with her sweet façade, and is reminded of the brief crush he had on her as a kid.

He moves from his crouched position, and notices a smaller male with buzzed hair watching them from the corner of his eye. He’s got an oversized hoodie on along with a ratty baseball cap and some jeans that have tears on the knees. Jean can’t help feeling a bit protective of Sasha, so he mentions toward the other male with a jerk of his head, not bothering to be subtle about it.

“Him? Oh that’s my boyfriend, Connie,” Sasha laughs and she seems to flush with pleasure at Jean’s outward expression of concern. “You’re still the same,” she says and Jean almost feels like he should be defensive, but he hears the clear fondness in her tone.

Eren comes around the corner, steps quick, and concern on his features.  A customer probably held him up, or Jean knew he would have ducked around as soon as Sasha’s scream echoed through the quiet store. “Don’t crowd him,” Eren says and steps between him and Sasha with an adorably screwed up expression. “He doesn’t like it.”

Sasha snorts and crosses both of her arms underneath her breasts; annoyed that Eren is speaking for him. “Look I think I know Jean a bit better then you,” she says and makes a sour expression at Eren, ”and Jean hates when people speak for him.” She puts an emphasis on the word hate, and looks at Jean so that he’ll agree with her.

Instead, Jean gives her an awkward smile and makes a motion toward his throat. Sasha only seems more troubled by this, and then her boyfriend is stepping in front of her in a protective motion. Jean only feels uncomfortable, and entwines his fingers with Eren, who is throwing a fiery glare at both Sasha and Connie. When Eren turns his gaze toward him, Jean feels the tension in the room lessen and Jean sighs with relief, brushing his nose against Eren’s temple as he sags forward. Eren gently pats his shoulder, a promise that no violence or screaming will occur, and Jean huffs in Eren’s mixed scent of pine and cinnamon to calm him self.

“You really can’t talk?” Sasha’s question is tentative, and Jean steps back from Eren to nod. “What happened Jean?” She looks so concerned that he feels bad for stepping back in fear when she attempts to cup his face. Sadness fills her gaze, and Connie steps forward with a low noise that is between anger and understanding.

“Look Sasha, you ambushed the kid and he’s obviously not comfortable with it. Why not leave him your e-mail or something and he can contact you,” Connie says. His voice is smooth and he’s trying to keep any more feelings from getting hurt or tempers from flaring, and Jean is really grateful for that. “And I think you would do better off if me and green eyed freak over there weren’t around to interrupt.” Eren snarls, and Connie only smirks as if he’s amused to be proven right.

Sasha sighs, and nods. She doesn’t seem happy to be beating a retreat, she’s always the type to resolve any issues ASAP, but she also doesn’t seem to want to make him uncomfortable. Pulling a crumpled receipt from the pocket of her cardigan, she smoothes it out and jots down an e-mail address along with her cell phone number. Instead of holding it out to him, she extends her arm to Eren, and nods once it’s taken from her fingers. “Just contact me ok? Or I’ll come back here.” She tries to say it as a joke, but it comes out weak, and Jean feels horrible for making her feel anything resembling sadness.

Connie leads her out, and Jean cranes his head to watch them go through the glass door and out onto the streets of Trost. He feels awkward in his own body, seeing someone who he never thought he would see again, and Eren’s gentle fingers curl around his hand, and he lets the other lead him to the cash register while still in a haze.

Eren waits, patient, until Jean gets out of his jumbled thoughts, and just rubs his thumbs against the back of Jean’s knuckles to soothe him. Jean’s not quite sure how long it takes, but when he comes back, he’s looking straight into the encompassing green of Eren’s eyes. He must look apologetic because Eren’s eyes narrow in that way that tells Jean to stop it, and Eren slides him a legal pad and a sparkly purple pen.

Jean laughs at the pen, a short bark that is not quite right, and feels his cheeks flood with embarrassment as soon as the sound reaches his ears. Eren just squeezes his hand, and points to the legal pad. “If you want to tell me then just write it out ok? Or at least doodle, it’s almost four and you put most of the books away anyways so you can just keep me company behind here. You deserve a break since we’ll be here for another three hours or so.” With that, Eren begins to organize some of the random supplies that the bookstore carries, all laid out on the shelves in front of and behind the cash register.

His fingers enfold the pen, and he lets the sparkles sink into his palm, beginning to ponder how much he wants to divulge to Eren. He figures that the best place to start would be Sasha, considering that Eren just met her, but a deeper part of him wants to tell Eren everything about his past; to explain how he ended up as a homeless teenager with so many issues. Jean knows that Eren would understand it, maybe has heard similar stories before, but Jean also doesn’t want to unload on Eren too fast because it’s only been about two days, and he’s already relying on Eren too much.

So instead, Jean begins an intricate design of swirls and random sparkles to compliment the prettiness of his pen. He pushes down his need to jot down the story of any part of his life, because he knows that he won’t be able to stop when he starts. Eren flutters behind him, and pauses to glance over his shoulder. Jean can feel him let out a sigh, one that he knows is heavy with disappointment, but he still continues to cover the page with doodles, adding bows to distract himself further.

Jean is just too scared to share too much of himself, he doesn’t want to frighten any more people out of his life, and he’s starting to think that Eren is already more important then the others that have left him behind.


	6. Chapter 6

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Oh shit I just dived head first into Fairy Tail, and have been marathon-ing it this week. My friend tried to get me to read it when I was high school, which was forever ago, but I didn’t and now I have to catch up on so many episodes! I love everyone in that show though, but my love has cost me because I was so bad with writing this week. The only good thing is, I figured how I want the kiss scene to go when that comes up.~
> 
> Also I was going to make this longer, and I was trying to add more to the ending, but I realized that WAS the perfect spot to end. :3

Eren had been studying for the better part of the day, sneaking peeks at the American Sign Language book he had grabbed off the shelf of the Languages section. Even when customers came in, he continued to practice his signing while carrying on conversations with them, and ignored the weird looks they threw at him. He was usually not the type that picked up things fast, but he had always been the type of person that had excellent muscle memory, so Sign Language was surprisingly easy for him. When he hears the shout of Jean’s name though, he stumbles to hide the book and flusters around until he drops it into a random drawer, jumps over the counter, and rushes to where he knows Jean is stocking the shelves.

He sees a cute girl cornering Jean, and Eren’s blood pressure starts rising as his protective instincts go into over drive.  His feet carry him over to Jean without him even having to command them, and his mouth spouts off words that he doesn’t even remember. His anger doesn’t abate until the girl leaves with her boyfriend in tow. He just knows that he didn’t like either of them, how they thought it was all right to be around Jean. He wouldn’t call it jealousy; he’s not THAT petty after all. (He knows he was being a jealous bastard though). Later, he feels bad about it especially when Jean flutters around and actively avoids any type of contact with him.

At first, Eren thinks that Jean is annoyed that he had behaved in such a fashion, but then Eren realizes that Jean’s reaction don’t stem from anger or annoyance, or at least that anger and annoyance isn’t directed at him. He realizes that Jean is trying to close himself off from Eren, and that causes Eren’s heart to clench because he can’t pinpoint exactly why Jean would do that. He does know that he needs to confront him though, and waits until Levi comes and kicks them out of the shop. He doesn’t need anyone walking in on them, and interrupting Jean’s need to express himself, so he waits until they get home.

\---

When they get back to the warehouse, Jean moves inside at a quick pace and without any kind of explanation. Eren frowns and stumbles after him, bypassing the curious gazes of Armin, Annie, and Mikasa. He holds his hand up in a sign to them, showing that he needs privacy with Jean, and then hears them close the door to the small office. Later, they’ll all corner him for information, but his mind is focused only on Jean.  

Jean disappears into the bathroom, and Eren pauses, thinking about waiting for him to come out, but his thoughts urge him forward. He’s always been the type of guy that acts on his impulses and deals with the consequences later on, and he can’t let this issue lay anymore. When he pushes open the door, Jean is standing with his shirt hanging on his arms, chest bare and his pants unbuttoned to reveal a peek of his boxers. Eren can’t help noticing the flush that spreads over his cheekbones, but he storms forward and pushes on Jean’s chest until the other’s back is against the wall. It’s a natural reaction for him, but it’s a tad on the aggressive side and he takes a step back when Jean flinches.

“Don’t you dare pull away from me Jean,” he demands and watches Jean’s eyes flicker about the room, looking for any way to avoid those words. “Don’t you do that to me,” he repeats, and frowns when his voice cracks from the emotional confession. Jean’s eyes finally return to him, and he purses his plush lips in concern.

Eren continues to watch him, and Jean entangles his hands from the sleeves of shirt, and lets the item fall to the floor. Eren’s gaze drifts over the slenderness of his wrists, travels up the slight muscle on his arms, and is distracted by the starkness of Jean’s ribs pressing against his pale skin. He reminds himself that Jean still needs to gain more weight, that he needs to ask Annie to bring back pastries from her job, before Jean interrupts him by waving his hand across Eren’s face.

“ **I’m fucked up**.” It takes a few seconds for Eren to place the signs, and he knows his face is twisting up into an unpleasant expression. “ **I am, Eren, I’m fucked up.** ” Eren can’t help the snarl that rumbles up from deep within him, and glares at the pitiful look on Jean’s face.

Both of his hands reach up, gentle and soothing, unlike the noise he had previously released. “Jean,” he begins and watches as those doe-like brown eyes lock on his, “you are not fucked up.” He puts all his conviction in it, and he knows that it might take Jean a while to take the words to heart, but Eren will repeat them for as long as he needs him too. “You’re a little broken, we all are here, but you don’t need to pull away from us, from me.” He lowers his voice and steps closer, feeling the warmth of Jean’s skin.

Jean’s eyes shutter, and his breath hitches, which makes Eren realize that the other is expecting a kiss, and Eren aches with need to give Jean everything he wants, especially something as sweet as a kiss. Somehow though, he stops himself, but allows his hand to lips to brush underneath the softness of his earlobe, a poor substitute for the real thing. He can’t give in now, he doesn’t want to take advantage; he wants Jean to take that step forward when he’s ready.

Jean jolts toward him when he steps away, and Eren gives him a smile that is reassuring. “Shh, it’s fine,” he murmurs, and he doesn’t know if the reassurance is more for his own beating heart or for Jean’s. There is a question in Jean’s eyes, and Eren turns around to get a towel for the taller teen. “It’s not that I don’t want you,” he says once his back is turned, “but I also don’t want to rush into this with you.”

When he glances over his shoulder, Eren discovers that Jean’s flush does indeed extend all over his chest, and almost chokes at the adorableness. “God Jean,” he groans underneath his breath, and shoves the towel into his chest. “You need to take a shower, and I need to leave this room, before I take back my words. I need to redeem my past shitty self, but you make it so hard.” With that he storms out, and slumps against the wall near the bathroom door. This kid is going to be the death of him.


	7. Chapter 7

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> WARNING FOR THIS CHAPTER: some solo jean action, which I wanted to warn for because he is still technically 17 right now in the fic! I know some people might be bothered by this, so I wanted to point it out so you can skip over that scene. Also it’s got a light BDSM undertone. ^^;
> 
> I’ll just count this chapter was my entry of erejean week because we all know I love them! They are my babies. 
> 
> ;) So have a little bit of smut, even if it’s not the smut you guys want. (That will come later).

Jean stands against the wall, heart pounding and knees shaking, for another five minutes before he manages to drag himself into one of the shower cubicles. He turns the water to lukewarm, trying to cool himself down, but shudders as the skin that Eren kissed pulses pleasurably. He can feel his stomach twisting and his cock filling with blood. He tries to ignore it, soaps up his body, but he pauses to tweak at one of his nipples and whines into the quietness of the room. He figures no one will bother him, but to be safe he braces one arm against the wall, and pushes his mouth against his forearm to muffle any noise.

His teeth bite into the flesh as soon as he runs this thumb over the head of his cock, spreading around the pre-come, and imagining that Eren is looming behind him. He works himself hard and thoroughly, wanting to tease other places on his body, but not daring to. The thought of anyone overhearing him would kill him, the embarrassment too much to handle, and so he just bites harder into the flesh of his arm to keep down the loud whine that gets caught in his throat.

He imagines Eren panting a litany of dirty words in his ear, praising Jean for being such a good boy as Jean thrusts into the tightness of his fist. He ends up coming as he imagines Eren’s teeth digging into the flesh of his shoulder, and Jean lets his chest fall flat against the coolness of the tile. He gives himself a few seconds, panting beneath the now freezing water, and then washes away the damning evidence.

He ponders over the fantasy that he had conjured up, and feels confused by the whole thing. Jean isn’t a virgin; he has had a couple of awkward tumbles with Marco, quick and hushed since they never had a quiet place to explore. Never before has he really pondered anything behind that though, and maybe he is now because Eren is older and seems more experienced. He realizes he’s starting to shiver though, and he resumes the task of showering.

It’s been so long since he’d had the privacy or time to touch himself, and the relaxing effect is almost immediate. His eyelids are heavy as he scrubs his scalp, and he sluggishly wraps his lower body in a towel. He realizes that he rushed in and hadn’t grabbed clothes, so he scrambles across the hall as fast as he can, and slams the door to the joint bedroom close. When he turns around, Eren is looking at him with wide eyes, and Jean stumbles back against the closed door, embarrassed and surprised. 

Eren’s warm chuckle causes his ears to tinge pink, and he makes a grand show of turning toward the wall and closing his eyes to give him privacy. Jean snorts and stomps around to grab the clothes that Eren must have laid out on the bed, tugging on the tread bare tank and plaid boxer shorts. When he’s finished, he throws the towel at Eren’s head, and grins widely when the other almost topples off the side of the bed.

Eren scoops it up, ready to throw it back at him, but Jean ducks underneath his blankets and when he peeks back out, Eren is instead crawling into the bed with him. “ **Is this okay?”** Jean blinks multiple times, realizing that Eren had signed at him, and he can’t help the way his vision becomes misty from tears. He throws both of his arms around Eren, nuzzling his face into the side of his neck, and nods frantically so the other won’t go anywhere.

“Why are you crying you loser?” Eren’s tone is so gentle and Jean melts against him when Eren’s fingers begin to massage the nape of his neck. A few tears smear into the skin of Eren’s neck, but Eren doesn’t push him away, merely lays the both of them down and lets Jean cuddle closer.

Jean begins rubbing his fingers over Eren’s ribs, breathing in the scent of Eren once again. He had smelled it for the first time earlier that day, his sickness finally abating, and Jean couldn’t be happier about it. He finally lifts his head and locks his eyes with Eren; raising the arm he’s not laying on and brushing some of Eren’s hair from his forehead. He flushes, surprised by his own actions, and then signs: “ **thank you** ,” to let Eren know how much him learning sign language meant to him.

“There’s no need to thank me,” Eren mutters and Jean can’t quite pinpoint what emotion makes his eyes shimmer in such an attractive way. “Besides I’m just getting started, so thank me when I master it.” Jean can’t help the laugh that bubbles out of him at Eren’s cocky statement, and drops his head onto the pillow next to the other.

He lets his eyes roll over Eren’s body, noticing how even though Eren is smaller in height then him, he is not at all fragile. Eren has broad shoulders and muscles that aren’t bulging, but a lot bigger then Jean’s own. Eren is compact where as Jean is lank, and Jean can’t help appreciating that. He shifts his gaze back toward Eren, and notices that the other is examining him in the same way, and Jean can’t help shifting uncomfortably. Jean hates his body right now, knows it’s too scrawny and too pale, but stops squirming when Eren’s hand lands on his hip to tug him closer.

“Stop it,” Eren says into the small space between them, and Eren entwining their legs as if to ensure that Jean won’t escape. Jean knows that Eren isn’t talking about the squirming, and wonders how Eren can tell when Jean is thinking negative thoughts. So for Eren’s sake, he pushes those thoughts to the side and rubs his nose against the underside of his jaw.

Eren makes a noise that resembles a purr, and Jean hums in response. “Hey when’s your birthday?” Jean makes another noise, too lazy to pick his head up and look Eren in the eye, and lazily raises his hand to sign: “ **April 7 th**.” Eren makes a surprised noise, and rolls Jean beneath him, hovering and looking into his face. Jean just looks up at him, confused by the reaction.

“That’s not that far away, you know?” Jean actually doesn’t know, since living on the streets, he has a bad habit of just losing time. Days would continue on, but he wouldn’t bother to glance at the calendar to figure out what days they were. “It’s the 26th of March in this endless winter,” Eren jokes. Jean smiles, small and tired, but still sweet as ever as Eren’s body heat soaks through the front of his shirt. “We’ll have to plan something really nice.” 

Jean must look flabbergasted because Eren snorts, and knocks his knuckles against his temple. “You’re so stupid,” he says and Jean shivers when Eren runs his knuckles down the side of Jean’s face. Eren looks like he’s going to say more, but rolls off Jean when the door swings open. Mikasa and Annie shoot them an odd look, but Armin just makes his way to their combined bed and crawls into the middle of it.

Jean isn’t sure what to do with them in the same room, wonders if Eren wants them to know about whatever this thing is going on between them, and is worrying his lower lip when he’s tucked against Eren’s side. Eren’s fingers reach for his lips, gently prying them apart, probably so that Jean will stop chewing on his already chapped lips. There is a bead of blood on his lip, and Eren smears it with his thumb, and Jean feels heat boil in his stomach. Eren’s thumb lingers, and feeling bold, Jean swipes his tongue over the callused fingertip. Eren makes an animalistic growl, low and heavy in his chest, and Jean has the burning urge to kiss him. He is leaning up to do so, their breath mingling and mouths only inches from each other, when a loud cough causes them to pull away from each other.

It’s Annie and she has such a caustic expression that any arousal Jean had felt completely disappears. He realizes that the look is directed at Eren, rather then him, and that causes him to relax a tiny bit. He shifts off Eren and tugs the blankets closer to his body. He slides one of his hands into Eren’s to show him that he doesn’t want him to leave. Eren’s fingers squeeze his, even while Annie and him continue their wordless conversation. Soon, Annie turns and climbs into the bed, nestling against Mikasa’s back with a huff, and Eren lets go of his hand briefly to burrow underneath the covers.

Jean wiggles around to get comfortable, flipping so that he’s on his side and facing the wall that their bed is pressed up against. He feels movement behind him, and then Eren’s arm hooks around his waist, and Jean lets out a content hum. He cups his hand over Eren’s after he tugs the blanket almost fully over his head. Jean enjoys finally being in a place where he feels comfortable enough to tug the blankets over his eyes, and to let his hearing be muffled by the fabric as well, even at home; he had hardly felt safe sleeping in his preferred position. Eren’s breath stirs the hair on the top of his head, and Jean smiles as he presses his body backward into Eren’s body.

Soon, he’s on the cusp of sleep, listening to Eren’s little snores behind him, and Jean can’t believe that his life has changed so swiftly. With one last sigh, he gives into the darkness behind his eyelids.


	8. Chapter 8

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> LMFAO so I realized the random date I put in, while I was typing this new chapter, was Eren’s birthday!!! So, I changed it because, uh, like any of these losers would forget Eren’s birthday, I’m sorry for the brain fart. All mistakes are my own since I beta all my own work, so I apologize. 
> 
> So I’m thinking about making this part of a series, and have the next one concentrate more on Eren’s past. Right now, I know the story is heavily based around Jean, but I think it’s necessary at the same time. I think Jean needs to be focused on before; I can focus on the others even though I have a lot of ideas for Eren and the others. 
> 
> I don’t know if any of you read the other notes, but if you do – tell me what you think. 
> 
> Also I apologize for this being late, I was crying over baby Jean. This update is rather short because I thought that ending was too perfect to add more, but the next one will be longer!

Eren spends his time in the next few days learning more sign language, trying not to ravage Jean, and planning a huge party with Armin, Annie, and Mikasa. He wakes up with Jean hovering over him, disorientated and half asleep. Jean is laying on his side, propped up on one of his arms and facing him with their legs brushing together. Eren is on his back staring up at him, blinking away sleepiness as he notices the halo of light shining around Jean’s head. Jean cups his chin, and trails kisses over his forehead, eyelids, cheeks, and even the tips of his ears. When Jean pulls back, he’s flushed and Eren can’t help smiling at his adorable expression. 

“What was that for?” He whispers into the darkness between them, voice husky from sleep. He reaches his hand up, and strokes it down Jean’s spine so the other knows how much he appreciates the wake up call. 

Jean’s eyes close for a few moments, content with the warm touch, and Eren can’t help just watching him. Jean is so strikingly beautiful with his strong jaw, smoky lashes, and lengthy neck. It kills Eren that Jean doesn’t seem to realize this. He is pulled away from his thoughts when Jean’s smooth palm cups his chin, and turns his face in his direction. Eren frowns because he can feel Jean trembling beneath his touch, and rubs his thumb against his ribs in an attempt to calm him. 

Right when Eren is about to open his mouth, Jean does so instead. “H-Happy birthday,” Jean says, hushed and sore from disuse, but such a gift that Eren just stares at him in disbelief. It doesn’t sound exactly like he imagined, but he thinks that if Jean continues to use his voice, when he’s ready, that it will. For now though, he leans up and slants their mouths together. 

Jean tenses at first, but melts against him as Eren guides him with gentle pressure, a tongue sweeping over his plush lower lip. He can tell Jean isn’t too mastered, and that makes the experience all the sweeter when Jean’s mouth parts underneath his. Eren’s tongue glides in, brushing against Jean’s, and swallowing the dreamy moan that he coaxes from Jean. He’s not surprised that Jean tastes of a weird mixture of cinnamon, dark chocolate, and a hint of mint. When he rakes his tongue over the roof of Jean’s mouth, Jean melts against him and Jean ends up throwing one of his legs over his hip. Soon Jean’s palms are on his stomach and clenching at the fabric of his t-shirt, and Eren can’t help the grunt that escapes his lips when Jean’s palms sit on his bare abs. He pulls back just enough to nip at Jean’s upper lip, and sucks it briefly until Jean whines aloud. He decides he needs to stop before this goes way too far, and drops his head back against the pillow with a sigh. 

Jean is dazed, lips reddened, and Eren can’t help caressing his lower lip with his thumb. “Thank you so much, that’s the best gift I’ve ever been given.” He makes sure his voice is overflowing with gratitude so that Jean can’t mistake his words for anything less then the truth. True, he had always wanted to hear Jean’s voice, but never before the other was ready, and he never thought it would be this soon. 

Jean’s eyes flit around, embarrassed or nervous; Eren can’t quite tell which so he waits to see what will happen. He doesn’t move, keeps both of his hands by his sides, and keeps still. Jean shifts finally, about thirty seconds into Eren’s endeavor to keep still, and lets Jean straddle his hips. He watches as Jean grabs both of his hands, how Jean’s fingers stroke over his own, and smiles as Jean leans forward until their foreheads are resting against each others. They share the same air, breathing against the other’s lips, until Jean shifts backwards. 

“ **I wanted to give you a special present, but I’m not ready to speak all the time** ,” Jean signs. Eren notices that Jean’s hands are shaking, like he’s expecting to be reprimanded. Eren grabs both of them when he’s done signing, and brings them up to his mouth to press barely there kisses to the knuckles. 

“Jean I couldn’t ask for more then you’ve already given me,” he says against the skin, watching as his breath causes the tiny hair to shift. When he locks eyes with Jean, the other is watching him with veneration and Eren fiercely wants to kiss him, but the pattering of feet in the hall prevents him from doing so. 

Mikasa always makes a big deal out of his birthday, as he does about hers, and he knows that he’s dragged both Annie and Armin into her plan. It’s no wonder that Jean figured out when his birthday is because Mikasa more then likely outright told him. She’s never been the type to conceal her excitement when it comes to celebrations, and Eren’s surprised that she hasn’t revealed the plans to the joint party that they’ve all been planning behind Jean’s back. 

Before they can storm into the bedroom, Eren sits all the way up with his back against the wall and tugs Jean close until the other is cuddled with his head on his shoulder. His fingers trail over his spine just as the door swings open, but Jean is too relaxed to jerk away like a scared kitten as he usually would. Eren laughs when he sees Mikasa, Annie, and Armin carrying a cake that has to be held up by the three of them. The frosting is mint green in color with random creatures on it like the ones he used to dream about; they’re creepy dudes with no genitals and too many muscles. His father had thought he had mental issues, but Mikasa always teases him about it and now they’ve been on his cake every year since. Even Annie and Armin think they’re normal by now, and he feels happy at the thought that he’ll have to explain it to Jean now too. But for now, Jean keeps his head against Eren’s neck, and mouths the lyrics of Happy Birthday into his skin as his friends sing aloud. 


	9. Chapter 9

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Ok so I’m sorry about the lack of on time update last week. I got a new job AND broke my toe so I was just trying to adjust to everything. Please don’t think just because I have a job that I won’t be updating, this story was what kept me going through the time I didn’t have a job and I won’t let it remain unfinished! Also, because of this new job, I’m going to change the update day to Sunday. 
> 
> Now onward to the fic!

Jean still gets flustered; a week later, when he thinks about the fact that he had spoken for Eren. Eren doesn’t bring it up in front of anyone else, which reassures Jean because that takes any and all pressure off of him. At night, when Eren is sleeping sweetly next to him, Jean tries to whisper words to him, but his voice still isn’t ready.

During one of these times, Eren wakes up and rolls over to peer at him in the darkness. Jean sputters and looks away from him, but Eren’s smooth lips rub over his throat, and Jean melts into the sheets. “Don’t push yourself,” Eren says. His voice is deep from slumber, and Jean swallows down the tickling in the back of his throat. He turns on his side, and presses three soft kisses beneath Eren’s earlobe as a sign of affection and gratitude.

Eren lets out a little purr, and tucks Jean’s head underneath his chin, which makes Jean smile at the protective gesture. He let his breath tickle against Eren’s neck, admiring the russet color of his skin, as his vision gets blurry. Soon, he’s drifting off to sleep while the heat rolling off Eren lulls him to sleep.

\---

The next day, Jean wakes up relaxed and content even though his nose is smooshed against Eren’s shoulder. The other male is looking at through heavy lids; his face smoothed out with affection, and Jean pulls back to rub at his numb nose.

“You were snorting, it was annoyingly adorable,” Eren says, and Jean’s ears burn in embarrassment. Eren’s answering grin is sleepy and sweet and Jean has the urge to punch him because what the fuck? How does Eren have a direct line to the tempo of his heartbeat? With a little whine, he shoves the other’s face away, and rolls over to push his face into the coolness of his pillowcase to get his skin back to its normal color. Eren just chuckles, and leans forward to lightly brush his lips against the nakedness of Jean’s nape.

“Tomorrow is your birthday,” Eren whispers into the skin. Jean used to feel so much anxiety about the day before, the day of, and the day after his birthday, but it’s been smothered by Eren dragging him backward so the cradle of Eren’s hips are pressed against his ass. Eren is sporting a semi, and Jean hums and teasingly rolls his hips backward. Eren grunts and bites at the flesh of Jean’s neck and Jean shudders, a grunt escaping his lips. “You want an early present?” Eren’s voice is smoky with desire, and Jean whines because that’s as close as he can get to asking nicely.

Jean’s breathing increases as Eren soothes the bite mark with kisses, laving it with his tongue occasionally as well. Eren cups Jean’s hip, and Jean bites his lower lip as he realizes that Eren is holding him steady so he can continue to rut against him. Impatiently, Jean reaches back and tugs at the baggy fabric of Eren’s basketball shorts. He wants to feel the silky heat of Eren’s erection, and as soon as possible. Eren seems to sense his desperation and shucks off his shorts in a move that is so graceful; it almost makes Jean jealous, but is distracted by Eren drawing Jean’s boxers down below his ass.

Jean wants to turn his head, to stare at the size and shape of Eren’s cock, but Eren is spreading Jean’s thighs apart as far as the elastic will allow. “Hold it there,” Eren commands, and Jean trembles at the authoritative tone. He doesn’t move an inch, and waits while Eren rummages around the room. He examines the crack on the wall that looks like a lightening bolt, and tries to keep his breathing even because he already feels on the edge of coming without hardly any stimulation. Soon Eren is back, pressed against him and reaching around to cup his balls, and Jean drops his head backwards to Eren’s shoulder as his eyes clench shut.

Eren is caressing his balls, the skin so warm it causes him to whine, and Eren’s breathing is ragged against his ear. “Do you want me to fuck your thighs?” Jean nods wildly, wanting whatever Eren is offering to give, and Eren is pushing his cock, slick and warmed with lube, through the gap of Jean’s thighs. The head of his cock hits his balls, smearing precome, and Jean reaches down to caress the length of it. Eren feels about the same size as him, but decidedly thicker, and Jean’s mouth waters at the thought of it. Before he can start a further exploration or shove Eren backwards to give him a sloppy blowjob, Eren is pulling back then thrusting forward again.

Jean whines, throwing his arm over his shoulder to cup the back of Eren’s head, and craning his neck to beg for kisses. Eren’s eyes are glazed, free hand rolling his balls, and Jean is whining even louder until Eren is smothering the cries with his own lips. Jean rolls his hips backwards, moving with Eren, and sucking at his upper lip as Eren’s groans echo through the room. Jean watches as Eren slides back, a thread of spit between them, and Jean flushes at the dirtiness of the situation even as Eren continues to fuck his thighs.

“Look at you,” Eren grunts, his hand moving up to give a rough jerk to Jean’s cock. “So flushed and pretty, your lips bruised,” he stops to twist his hand and Jean squeals despite himself. “Will you look this pretty if you let me fuck you?” Jean clenches his fingers into Eren’s hair, body spasming at the combination of dirty talk, Eren’s pelvis bones slapping against his ass, and the roughness of Eren’s tugging. His mind turns to the thought of Eren fucking him, and he comes with a scream that is tapered off by Eren shoving his index and middle finger into his mouth. Jean is trembling; his stomach and the sheets wet with his own come as Eren continues moving behind him. When he comes back to his senses, Jean begins to suck at Eren’s fingers, rolling his tongue over the calluses on his fingertips. Eren gives one last thrust, his pelvic thrusts turning Jean’s ass redder, as Jean feels Eren’s come coat his thighs and balls.

Jean pants around Eren’s fingers, some drool pooling out of his mouth, and Eren breathes behind him. Soon Eren is taking back his fingers, and manhandling Jean’s pliant body. Jean offers him a sated smile, and Eren returns it before grazing their lips together in a gentle kiss. Jean immediately responds, keeping the kiss light, until Eren shifts backward to stand. “Good thing we’re the only one around and also that we have the day off.”

Jean moves his own hair off his forehead, a lazy smile on his lips, before Eren is sweeping him into a princess hold. Jean smacks his pectoral, but doesn’t squirm out of his hold as Eren carts him into the bathroom. “ **Asshole** ,” Jean signs, and smiles as Eren lets out a throaty chuckle in reply.

“I just want to take care of my favorite boy.” Jean laughs at the sickly cooing in Eren’s tone. Jean walks his fingers down the side of Eren’s face fondly, admiring the cut of his jaw and the defined Adam’s apple at his throat. “Don’t look at me like that, you’ll make me blush.” Jean’s eyes dart up, and he notices that Eren already is so he merely leans up to trail kisses across the tops of his cheekbones. Eren lets him, and that makes Jean happier then he can describe. A second later, Eren turns the shower on, and the water is so freezing that when it hits his skin, he almost smacks Eren in the face as he flails to get away.

That damn handsome asshole sure knows how to ruin a perfectly romantic moment.


	10. Chapter 10

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I’m sorry that the other chapters have been short, but I think the smut (hopefully) makes up for it! I wanted to make the last two longer, but I was too tired from work – it’s okay though because I have something juicy planned out for the next few chapters. 
> 
> I also am planning a possible idea for a completely different Eren/Jean AU! It’s just a snippet of an idea right now, and I haven’t written anything yet, but I do enjoy writing in this fandom so don’t expect me to just disappear when this fic is done. 
> 
> P.S. I know my past few chapters have been shorter compared to what I have been writing, but I do want the party to be in Jean’s POV.

Eren has been running behind Jean’s back to help plan for the surprise party, and when he wakes up on the morning of Jean’s birthday – he feels content. Eren had always been the guy who fucked without attachments, nameless people with kind souls, but he felt like keeping them bound to him wouldn’t be right. Some silly part of him, the romantic part that hasn’t been squashed, wants to believe that it was because he was waiting for Jean.

He wants to be a better person for Jean, whom despite the trails he’s been through is still so pure of heart. So when he rolls over to spoon his object of affection, Eren can’t help feeling disappointed when there is only a cold spot. He drags his fingers down his face, and groans, because he knows he’ll have to roll out of bed to find him. He really just wanted to cuddle up to Jean and go back to sleep, but that asshole had to ruin his plans.

He shuffles out of bed, slow as possible, and then hops around once his feet touch the cold cement floor. He opens the cracked door of their shared bedroom, and peeks his head around to see that the furniture had been rearranged, along with Annie’s wrestling mat laid out. He steps out completely to see Annie and Jean circling each other.

Annie is clad in a sports bra, tight shorts, fist wraps, and nothing else, and he wonders if Jean is shirtless to match her. Her bare feet hardly make a sound as her steel blue eyes are narrowed and concentrated only on Jean. Eren’s been on the end of those eyes, and he’d rather spar with Mikasa any day.

His eyes are soon focused on Jean’s bare back as they stop circling, and Eren has to bite down on his lower lip to keep from making an inappropriate noise. Jean has gained back some weight, which half has gone to his beautiful ass, and the other has gone to his lean muscles. Eren hadn’t had the opportunity to see it up close, but he had noticed that Jean had been filling out Eren’s burrowed out clothes a bit better. He groans as Jean dodges a swift punch by Annie, sees the way the muscles in his long back bunch and contract as he twists to get back to his feet.

“Stop leering, Jaeger.” Armin’s voice takes him out of his aggressive staring contest with Jean’s back, but he has a hard time turning his attention toward Armin. The younger male is doing an amazing job of keeping his gaze from Annie, and somehow both of their eyes finally meet. “They’ve been doing this a lot, but you sleep like a rock until your internal alarm wakes you up so I’m not surprised this is the first time you’ve seen it.” Armin brushes his damp hair from his face, and offers Eren a sweet smile and an amused shake of the head.

“But Jean is usually sleeping when I get up,” Eren comments, confused because he always is the one to shake Jean awake. Now that he thinks about it though, Jean does tend to smell freshly showered, but he’s probably been too smitten to put the pieces together.

“Annie has to be at work around 6:00 AM so they work out for an hour at 5, Jean showers, and then goes back to bed,” Armin explains. Eren forgets that Armin is an incredibly light sleeper most of the night, and he tends to watch Annie get ready before going back to sleep. Armin shoots him a sly look out of the corner of his eyes, and Eren flushes because he’s woken up a couple of times from a passionate dream about Jean – and now he knows that Armin knew about it all along.

“Don’t say anything,” Eren hisses, while Armin lets out a laugh that borders on a giggle. When he turns around, both Annie and Jean are facing both of them. Jean has a white towel around his neck, and he’s patting at the sweat on his jaw. His bare chest is heaving, and Eren is tilting his head to the side while he gets fixated on the pinkness of Jean’s nipples. His head rears back from the sudden force of a towel in his face, and he rips it off to see that Annie is smirking at him, unsurprisingly towel-free.

“You were drooling,” she says. Eren hastily scrubs at his mouth while Armin, Annie, and Jean laugh aloud at his gullible action. He glares at each of them, and dramatically storms to the kitchen to dig out the huge bowl of fruit salad that Mikasa had thrown together. He keeps his back to them, even as he hears Annie and Armin cooing at each other and disappearing into the bathroom. He doesn’t want to think about what they’re doing in there especially since Armin just got out of the shower.

He dishes two bowls out, and only pauses when he feels Jean’s chin balancing on his shoulder. A smile curves on his lips despite himself, and he playfully and lightly pushes on Jean’s face. Jean grunts in annoyance, and pushes his face harder against Eren’s hand to make him stop, and Eren gives in to Jean’s demands.

Finally, Eren turns and tugs the sweaty boy into a soft kiss. “You smell awful, but happy birthday,” he mutters into his smooth lips, not wanting to pull back. Jean does pull back, a sweet abashed look on his face, and Eren can’t help sneaking a few kisses to Jean’s defined collarbone. It also lets him stare at Jean’s nipples until he can see that embarrassed red hue take over Jean’s chest. With a chuckle, he grabs the bowls and drags Jean to sit down on the mat since he’s far too lazy to right the couch.

Jean pulls his legs criss-cross, and his long fingers immediately sneak out a sliced strawberry and pops it into his mouth. Eren tries not to ogle his bare chest again, but it’s so hard when Jean has been hiding away his body for a while. Even yesterday, when Jean had so sweetly moaned and let him fuck his thighs, he had still been wearing a baggy t-shirt. He adjusts himself as his mind tries to replay those memories, but his cock has already been half hard since he laid eyes on Jean’s back.

“Is there anything you want to do today?” Eren questions, as he tries to get his mind off his own arousal and back on making this day special for Jean. Later, they are going to be throwing a party at Erwin’s impressive condo, but for now he’s going to distract Jean while the rest of them take care of the set up.

Eren watches, as Jean gets shy, his shoulders inching up toward his ears, before he shakes his head. Eren can’t help smiling and sneaks his fingers between Jean’s shoulder and ear to tickle the lobe. “We don’t have to go anywhere,” he says as a wicked grin comes over his face. “We could just play in bed all day.” He makes sure to pop the p so that Jean won’t mistake what he’s trying to see.

Jean squirms, and does this type of spastic dance before falling back then throwing an arm over his eyes. Eren laughs, adoring how adorable the other boy can be, and can’t help crawling closer and moving to straddle Jean’s hips. “You don’t need to hide from me,” he coos, removing Jean’s hands from his face and pinning them over the other’s head in a loose hold. “I just like when you blush.” The statement is honest, and that seems to fluster Jean even more.

Jean is teething at his lower lip, lust making his eyes darken to almost black, and Eren can’t help swooping down to catch his lips. Eren immediately pushes his tongue past Jean’s lips, perhaps too overeager, but feels reassured when Jean mewls sweetly. He chases the taste of fruit from every corner, and groans when Jean’s tongue darts along his. When Jean grinds upward, Eren pulls back with a hiss, but his eyes can’t ignore the way the veins in Jean’s neck are straining. He also notices how Jean hasn’t broken his loose hold, and that causes his head to spin with arousal.

Jean seems to be more submissive then he thought, and Eren is the type that has no problem exploring that side of the beauty beneath him. He’s been with partners that possess either dominant or submissive tendencies, but had never stayed with them long enough to more then dabble in the BDSM realm. He doesn’t know all of the rules, but he is willing to find out more - especially on whatever kinks that Jean happens to be into.

 “Do you like when I hold you down, baby?” He asks because that is the best way to figure stuff out, and also he has pretty much no impulse control. Jean’s whole body seems to spasm at the question, breathing accelerating and Eren wishes fiercely that they were alone in the warehouse. “Fuck,” he groans as he detangles himself from Jean, and falls on his side next to him. “You are going to be the death of me, babe.”

Jean snorts, and then lets out an agreeable laugh that causes Eren to throb with want. He glances over, and sees Jean is waiting for his attention so he can communicate: “ **me? You just fucking ask the most embarrassing things in that husky voice**. **Don’t call me babe either, it’s too cute**.”

Eren grins, sweeping his messy bangs from his forehead before shaking his head. “Well I want to give you what I want, which is why I ask and I’m calling you a babe because look at you.” He purposely runs his eyes down Jean’s body until the other kicks his thigh. With a smirk, he reaches down, entwining their fingers even though he’d rather be sucking Jean off. “I really do want to give you everything you want though,” he repeats, voice soft and sincere.

Jean’s face softens at those words, and he raises his free hand to sign: “ **Me too, everything and anything**.” Eren doesn’t even get scared when he realizes that he’s totally in love with Jean at that moment.


	11. Chapter 11

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I was so busy last week that I wasn’t able to post! I was working overtime and my mom’s birthday was also on mother’s day so I just running around the whole weekend as well. I hope that all of you aren’t too angry with me. 
> 
> I did figure out what plot I’m going to do for my next erejean fic, which will be so fuuuuun. It’s going to be combining some of my favorite fic tropes and it will be AU as well.
> 
> P.S. I know I promised smut, but I got some fluff inspo instead so the smut will come next chapter!

Jean comes out of a light sleep when he feels the warmth of fingers caressing the his brow. He mumbles, sleepy and pliant, before his eyelids twitch open to see the bleary image of Eren hovering over him. Jean turns his head into the gentle touch, almost being lured back into sleep until Eren flicks him on the forehead to snap him out of it. He scowls up at him, and swats him away while Eren laughs heartily at his disgruntled expression. 

“I’m not letting you sleep your whole birthday away,” Eren says with a smile that looks a tad mischievous. Jean tries to swat at him, embarrassed, but Eren catches his wrists, and then leaves over to seal their lips together. Jean’s lips are still swollen from all the kisses they’ve exchanged throughout the day, but he doesn’t protest to sharing more with Eren. Eren keeps it caste though, and pulls back to look down at him. “But I really have something planned, and I laid out some semi-nice clothes for you.”

Jean’s brows furrow, confused and still sluggish. Eren smoothes the crease on Jean’s forehead away with the pad of his thumb before standing up and leaving, probably so that Jean will get dressed. Jean almost pouts, because he’d rather just keep cuddling away the day, but he instead rolls out of the bed and picks through the clothes that are neatly folded on the opposite bunk. He finds a pair of black jeans that are without any rips and so definitely nicer then what he normally wears, along with a burgundy v-neck that he isn’t quite sure he can pull off. Eren picked it out for him though, and so he dons them and coifs his hair so that it looks artfully messy.

The clothes fit perfectly, and so he dons his socks and picks out his usual slightly scuffed combat boots to complete it. Twisting his black 11 mm gauges in his ears, he breathes out through his nose and goes out into the living room area only to groan at how gorgeous Eren looks. He’s wearing a white oxford shirt, the sleeves rolled up and revealing his tanned forearms, while on top of that is a buttoned up navy vest that fits closely to the panes of his body. Dark wash jeans hug his hips, practically painted to his legs and ass too if Jean had to guess, but he keeps on his combat boots too, which causes Jean to grin to himself.

“Fuck,” Eren mutters, breaking the silence, and their eyes both meet as soon as they stop checking each other out. “I knew you’d look amazing in that color,” he states, and Jean can feel his cheeks turning a shade that closely match it. Eren’s grin is crooked and charmed as he crosses the room, and Jean immediately nuzzles into his jugular to get a whiff of Eren’s comforting scent. Eren’s warm fingers tickle his spine, keeping them pressed tight together, until Jean pulls back.

“ **Where are we going?** ” Jean signs, letting his free fingers curl in Eren’s belt loops to keep him close. He is nervous, not about where Eren is taking him, but about the fact that Eren is giving too much to him – too much that he doesn’t deserve, and too much that can be disappear in the blink of the eye.

Eren has this innate ability to read him though, and slides a few kisses over his sharp cheekbones. “We’re going to a little get together that more then likely includes cake,” he says and Jean laughs because Eren tenses up like he just gave away a huge secret. “Fuck I wasn’t supposed to tell you that, but your cuteness has melted my brain you asshole.”

Jean pulls back, a grin stretching impossibly wide on his lips, and moves to grab his leather jacket so they won’t be late. He can feel Eren’s eyes on his ass, and can’t help the way that his hips start to sway a bit. He just hopes it doesn’t look awkward, but Eren isn’t laughing so that ups his confidence a smidgen.

Eren walks stiffly across the room when Jean glances over his shoulder, and Jean barely manages to push down any laughter as he fumbles to throw his jacket on. “We need to leave before we’re late and possibly before I throw you on the ground and fuck you.”

Jean almost chokes, damn Eren and his lack of subtlety. 

\---

They take the motorbike, and cross into the expensive part of Trost where the rundown houses because expensive townhouses, condos, and mansions. Finally, they stop in front of an old Victorian house with a beautiful wrap around porch and vines encircling the white columns. Jean’s jaw drops at the bay windows, and the light sandy brick that brings the whole house together. It’s the type of house as a kid he had dreamed about owning, and it’s the reason he never dared to cross into this side of town because he know he’d never be able to afford it.

There are a handful of vehicles in the driveway, and the only one he recognizes is the beat down Volvo that Armin, Annie, and Mikasa share. He’ll know someone else beside Eren and that gives him a bit of comfort in case Eren gets swept away from him sometime during the party. Jean manages to be less shaky when he gets off the bike, but still lets Eren snake his arm around his waist.

Jean is in too much awe to even ask who owns the house, and allows Eren to lead him up onto the porch and flinches in surprise when Eren knocks on the door. His wide eyed stare, makes Eren chortle and kiss his brow, and Jean almost pouts, but the door is wrenched open to reveal a well dressed Levi. The male’s expression is disgruntled as ever, but a little less in the house, and so Jean figures that he must live here.

“Get in here you shitty brats,” Levi says and Eren drags him into the house before Jean can even make his legs work. He manages to get his bearings back, and leans into Eren as they’re lead into a roomy living area with pristine white couches along with a cherry wood coffee table and matching side tables.

Eren elbows him in the side, and seconds later Jean is staring at a group of people, some familiar, and some not. They all seem to be friendly enough, but he shrinks against Eren despite all of this. Eren immediately steps into the position of support, and Jean couldn’t be more grateful when Eren leads him around the room and doesn’t let go of him for the whole night.

\---

 Around 12 AM, Jean is a giggly mess from champagne that Hanji had been sneaking him. He stumbles out onto the back porch, balancing an oversized piece of peanut butter chocolate cake that Annie and Petra had baked from scratch. He barely manages to land on one of the lawn chairs, his eyes crossed as they concentrate on the cake that he’s trying to not drop.

He hiccups; his eyes watching the cake wobble and he finally places it on his knee to begin devouring it. Unfortunately Jean’s stopped in his pursuit by someone tugging him back further onto the chair. He frowns, turning his head around to see three Erens watching him with an amused glint in their eyes.

“Can you really eat that whole thing?” Jean glares at them, blinking until they become one, and then uses his fork to slice off a huge piece before shoving it in his mouth to prove that he can. Eren just snorts, a fond expression crossing his face and making his tanned skin seem to glow. Jean has a hard time swallowing at how attractive he looks, and puts the cake on the side table to crawl on Eren and sloppily kiss him instead.

Eren hums against his lips, tongue sweeping into his mouth to chase the taste of cake, and Jean purrs as he threads his fingers into his hair. He just gave up eating his cake to kiss this son of a bitch, and that’s when Jean realizes that he loves Eren. He loves Eren for wanting to parade him in front of all of the people he cares about, for wanting to give him a wonderful birthday, and for not running away from him when seeing how fucked up Jean is.

When the kiss breaks, Jean can’t help the sob that escapes him, emotional from drinking and from his first wonderful birthday in so long. Eren immediately jerks up, wiping away tears with a franticness that is adorable. Eren is babbling questions, and Jean can’t help giggling all over again when Eren thinks the solution to drying his tears is to give him some more cake.

“I love you,” Jean says, making sure to use his voice because he feels those two words are too important not to be said out loud. He would feel mortified if he had been sober, but he’s grateful for the bubbly champagne as he takes the fork from Eren’s hand and shovels more cake in his mouth. He blinks up at Eren, noticing that he is frozen, and just chews as he waits for him to reply.

“I love you too you stupid drunk idiot,” Eren finally sputters out, and Jean titters around the fork at how adorable his dumb boyfriend is. Eren tugs it out of his mouth, and throws it across the dark yard so that he can smash their lips together again, and Jean couldn’t feel even happier then he is right now.


End file.
